THE MEDIATION PROCESS

The mediation process begins either with a request by the parties or a Court Order. In New Jersey, the parties must attempt to use mediation to settle issues before a trial can be set. The Court, however, cannot refer parties to mediation if there is a significant history of spouse abuse or domestic violence that would affect the mediation process.

The mediator, as a neutral and objective participant, plays an active role in the mediation process. The mediator helps identify issues, develop bargaining proposals, and conduct negotiations with the goal of coming to a settlement that meets the family’s needs. The mediator clarifies and organizes details, prompts discussion and cooperative communication, and manages conflict. The parties both meet with the mediator and may attend with or without legal counsel. The mediator will encourage the parties to speak freely and to vent their feelings to the extent that it is productive. The mediator maintains a sense of decorum, preventing interruptions and making sure the parties hear and understand each other’s communications. The mediator will then identify what she sees as the hurdles to be addressed and negotiations will begin. Once the parties reach an agreement, the mediator prepares a memorandum of understanding for the parties to sign. Following the mediation process, clients arrange for an attorney or other qualified persons to prepare a settlement agreement, based on the memorandum of understanding. Each party is urged to seek independent legal counsel to review the agreement. The parties may also need an attorney to assist them with filing the complaint for divorce and representing them at the final divorce hearing.